Wednesday, August 26, 2009


Being a parent is one of the most important, rewarding and toughest jobs. Every day we have to make choices on how to bring up our children. It is these experiences that help us become better parents.
From the very beginning as a result of the fall of man, God said to the woman, “Because of you that caused man to sin, I will greatly increase your pains in child bearing; with pain you will give birth to children.” That is the pain of love every mother experienced.
And Baby Makes Three
After being married for a year or two, pressure would come from in-laws and your own parents to start a family. Now, when you're a parent, how will your day-to-day life become changed? What do you expect? The result of sleep deprivation can make a person very irritable and turns tasks like household chores and errands into ordeals because one has less energy and can’t concentrate on what one is supposed to do.
All mothers have their own challenges to confront. The pregnancy temporarily robs them of their body shape and they would put on a couple of extra pounds, have dark circles around the eyes from late-night feedings and all these can make a woman feel self-conscious and less attractive to her partner. Some mothers may find it difficult to reconcile the image of a mother with that of a sexual woman, so they may become less interested in intimacy.
The sight of a baby may stir up surprising feelings of jealousy. Sometimes a new father gets jealous because the baby takes up too much of the mother’s time. A father may feel like a third wheel and the mother will have to adjust her time to cater for the needs of the father, too, otherwise the father may go astray.
When I first became a mother at the age of 22, I had to deal with the numerous and varied issues a child will encounter between birth, the growing up and eventually when the child leaves home. This is a great challenge.
After carrying a full term and experiencing the child birth which lasted about 6 hours, a long labour pain, I do not know who I want to blame. I said to myself I am not going to have another baby. But when the baby finally makes her way out from my womb, I change my feeling and said to myself, “It’s worth the pain” seeing a beautiful life coming out from you.
Forty days of confinement, I am not allowed to take bath or wash my hair, I have to eat the food cooked in wine and ginger and I cannot even enjoy air-conditioning or fan. All the restrictions are supposed to be for the good of the mother.
Being a young mother, I also learned to take responsibility to teach my daughter the good values and when the child grew older, it became a harder task to handle when she an adolescent

Having gone through this experience, I can conclude it is not easy being a parent. . Whether you are good parents or not will be shown by how your children appreciate you. It is like the story of the ‘Sower and the Seed’. The Sower took care of the seeds, watered them, gave them fertilizer, watched them grow and they grew and started to bear fruits. After my daughter graduated, she wrote this:-
“Today I have high self-esteem, confidence and found my ability in what I’m good at. It took me a very long time to look for what I love and good at doing, but ever since I found it, nothing can stop me from reaching my destination. I’m putting all my effort to achieve my dream and I know I’ll get there. It’s only a matter of time, and from this, I owe it to both of you. You always tell me that you are proud to have a daughter like me. I tell you…you should be proud of yourselves to be such excellent parents. Thanks.”
No Father’s Day or Mother’s Day can replace this statement from my daughter that can verify that I passed the test of being a parent.

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