Wednesday, August 5, 2009


Valiant Knight says...
Life goes on after a divorce. But what sort of life? For a man, his social life is not much affected unless he divorced because his wife left him for another man or his wife cheated on him. Then he may feel rather ashamed among his men friends. However, the main difference would be at home.
When he is at home, the moment he returns from work, he would notice that the house is in a mess and he has to clean up if he is the tidy type. If not he would leave it as it is and tomorrow, he will return to a greater mess! If he wants to clean up, he would not know where to start and he would not know where the gadgets are. He may find the vacuum cleaner but he may not get all the parts fitted together for it to be most efficient. If the bag is full, he doesn’t know where the spares are or even how to change it.
Should he manage to get the dust and rubbish into a bag, he may not know when he has to take out the garbage for collection. If he leaves it outside on a non-collection day, the dogs will drag all his rubbish around the neighbourhood. A couple of used condoms may be strewn across his old spinster neighbour’s house!
Then he looks into his fridge and low and behold can you imagine what he will or will not find in it? He may not even find a bottle of water to drink but he may find lots of beer or lots of stale and mouldy leftovers! He may find a foul odour but he may not know where it is coming from. The food he bought yesterday were hard frozen and he has to defrost it first before he can even heat it up or cook it, if he knows how to cook, that is.
He may resort to eating bread, biscuits, instant mee, even that is beyond him at times. His best alternative would be to go out for dinner or if he is sick of the polluted air of the city, buy home something already prepared to eat. He has to eat it all alone out of the package as he is unable to find any clean crockery and cutlery as he had used all of them and did not wash any.
Next he deals with the laundry. He has spewed all his used clothes all over his bedroom, drabbed on chair backs, on his bed, on the floor, all the hooks in the room and bathroom, some under his bed even. He opens his cupboard and could not find a clear t-shirt or a pair of clean briefs. How does the washing machine operate (if he still has one, after all, the ex-wife is entitled to half of everything and this may be part of his ex-wife’s half). Where and how much detergent to put in? Too little and there is no suds and too much the machine will be overflowing with foam! He will soon have to go out and buy new items which might very well include disposable briefs!
Coming home to a quiet house may be a blessing for most people, but to a recently divorced man who is used to his ex-wife’s nagging and his children screaming, it would be very strange indeed. The silence may shock him and he turns on the TV and the CD players just to get some noise. The loneliness sets in. To avoid it, he calls a few friends, but they may not be in or busy with their own thing. “No, not tonight, dear!” may very well be the answer to all his phone calls for a date. He sits alone in the living room watching a stupid programme on TV.
This is a realistic situation immediately after a divorce. Of course, we adapt after some time. We become better organized as a ‘bachelor’ again. We may even enjoy life as it is. However, it takes time to adapt. Most men would look forward to taking their children (if any) out for an exciting outing and send them home again. It would be fun without the unnecessary encumbrances. However, there will also be the agonising questions children toss at you, “Dad, when are you coming home to us?” How do you answer that? “I’m never coming home to you and your mother again!” would that be what you will say? Most likely you will say, “Soon, dear, soon”.
Many men remarry fast unlike women. Why? Men cannot live without a woman if he can find one that is foolish enough to have him! So men, enjoy your marriage while you have it, and when you don’t, try to get into one as quickly as you can!

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